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Majority Insecurity..!

By Robert Clements. Dated: 5/30/2016 11:49:48 PM

The dog was not in its best spirits. "Anything the matter with you?" I asked the dog. It didn't bother to look up. "The dog is not in good spirits," said the wife to me, I nodded and waited for others in the house to make similar comment. "Listen," I told the dog, "I don't know what's the matter with you, but they all think I did something to get you into foul mood." She didn't bother to look up.
"Take her to a psychiatrist," said the wife.
"Dog psychiatrist?" I asked, "They charge by the second..!"
"She needs help, she's into depression," said my younger one.
"We don't want a suicide case," said the wife.
"Dogs don't commit suicide," I said.
"It's a wonder she hasn't already," said my younger one, "considering the kind of master she has."
"I'm a kind, kind of a master," I said stubbornly, mentally giving the dog a kick.
"Then take her to a counselor," said the younger one.
"They charge by the second," I said lamely.
The dog counselor was a lady, at least she must have been one sometime, now she looked like a dog. "How do you do" I said politely.
"Woof," she said to my dog, ignoring me.
"Woof," my dog replied.
"Dog's into depression," I said.
"Woof, woof," said the canine psychiatrist to the dog, then turned to me, "She's not happy with the political atmosphere"
"So am I," I said eagerly. "Bomb blasts and corruption, no confidence motions and communal tensions..!"
"Not the country," said the dog counselor. "The political atmosphere at home."
"Oh," I said, giving the dog another mental kick. "I had no idea she had problems living with us."
"It's getting a minority insecurity."
"Is that so?" I asked, giving it one more imaginary kick.
"Your tone is very condescending," said the dog lady looking at me severely. "Do you know what it is to be a minority in a majority set up?"
"I'm sorry," I said not wanting to get into a brawl with the dog lady. "What do you suggest I do?"
"Inclusion of dog language as one of the spoken languages in your house, exercising it's freedom to bark at only those it feels the need to bark at and not at anyone you feel threatened by.And reservation to eat at your table! "
"Woof, woof," said the dog.
"Woof," said the lady, as she made out my bill.
"You don't look in good spirits today," said the wife to me next morning. "Majority insecurity, about a minority presence..!" I said, glaring at the dog as it sat in its reserved seat at my table.
"Woof, woof," said the dog joyously.
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