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Merry England..!

By Robert Clements. Dated: 6/30/2016 10:18:28 AM

“What are you doing dear?” asked Prince Philip as he watched his wife the queen of England juggle her head into a piece of gold wire. “What’s that funny thing you’re trying to place on your head?”
“It’s the crown!” said the queen crossly, “It’s just that I haven’t been wearing it these many years and you’ve forgotten how it looks!”
“And why have you pulled it now?” asked her husband the prince consort.
“Didn’t the people vote for me to rule again?” asked the queen curiously, “Wasn’t that what they were voting for? To have their old queen rule their merry England again?”
“Ye gads!” shouted the old prince, “Then I better get my sword!”
“Sword?” asked the old queen still trying to balance her crown, “You want me to hold a sword when I can’t hold this damn crown?”
“But you need to chop off heads now!” said the prince in right earnest, “Chop off all the heads, now the people want you back!”
“And who’s head should I chop off first?” asked the queen, as she saw her crown fall.
“Why Camilla ofcourse!” said the prince, “And then we could finish with Charles once you’ve got the hang of it!”
“That’s a convincing thought!” whispered the queen, “Him and trying to be gay, hasn’t he done enough to break the monarchy!”
“What’s that noise?” asked the prince as he looked at the palace butler.
“There’s a mob at the gate your highness!” said the butler bowing.
Áh maybe they want their queen to stand in the balcony and wave at them!” said the queen looking pleased, “But first I’ll have to get this damn crown to stand straight, don’t want it falling off when I wave at them!”
“I don’t think they just want you to wave your hand at them, your majesty!”
“Then what do they want?” asked the queen.
“They want you to throw some gold on them! Can you hear them?”
“Bread!”
“Money!”
“Jobs!”
“What are they saying?” asked the queen.
“Now that they’ve left the EU, there’s no food, no money, and no jobs!” said the butler, “They feel as their monarch you will have to fix it for them! They remember tales of Merry England where the King and Queen threw gold and silver on the crowd and England lived happily ever after! Shall I bring down the treasure chests?”
“What do we do?” asked the prince consort, staring at his wife kicking the crown under the table.
“Run!” said his wife the queen.
“Run where?” asked the prince.
“To Europe!” whispered the queen as she hobbled to the back door of the palace, “We’ll seek asylum from these madmen and their Merry England..!”
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